Archive for the 'Useless Toys' Category
April 28th, 2006
Posted in Stupid Shit, Useless Toys
3WDM
Frank Schmitt 2000 says “Look Ma, No Hands!” …Talking about his 3WDM Electric Thing.
Watch out for curbs.
April 22nd, 2006
Posted in Stupid Shit, Useless Toys
Scarpar All Terrain Skateboard
Check out this crazy tank Skateboard.
“We are aiming for between 35 and 50 mph (60-80kmh). There are trade-offs to make in terms of power (torque) and speed which we are working through.
Bottom line is that we know we need to scare you … we won’t ship a product that isn’t going to give you a huge buzz, and make you scream.”
You can ride over logs on this thing… What the Fuck?
January 25th, 2006
Posted in Stupid Shit, Useless Toys
SunRiser Skateboard Headlights
Flux Industries went down exactly like we thought it would. Now you can skate at night with SunRisers.
FYI: Most cities require skateboards to meet the same lighting regulations as bicycles for night riding, a forward facing white light, and rear facing red light.
Be sure to follow the safety guidelines…
Warning: SunRisers are extremely bright. Do not look directly into the light. Doing so may result in temporary blindness or permanent damage.
October 10th, 2005
Posted in Stupid Shit, Useless Toys
Portable Coping?
If we ever see any of you trying to screw around and add this shit to a spot that is being skated… There will be another case in court about some dude getting beat with a Skateboard. Don’t think for a second that this crap will benefit Skateboarders. It will not.
“Portacope allows your child to Skate and ride without damaging property or equiptment”
You don’t go outside and make your terrain easier to Skate… You go out and annihilate your terrain.
And don’t go making friends with Law Enforcement. You’ll thank us for telling you that when you start being a Skateboarder and stop being a puss.
(via Mostly Skateboarding)
September 22nd, 2005
Posted in Stupid Shit, Useless Toys
C_Flex Innovations Flex_One
Simon Lain has applied for patent #2005903060 in Austrailia for his Flex_One trucks that cost $198.00 (inc.GST) per pair!
Daniel Gezmer actually comes out looking good after you check out Simon’s Crap. The “Powerfull 680 Newton Flex Effect” will most certainly break after the first 5 stair+ trick you try and you know the lapper on these things will make grinding soooo fun to figure out. Gullwing used to have a little truck pussy to keep you on the curb but these “innovative” skateboard handles aren’t even that cool.
Nice Try
(via the hotcrew)
September 12th, 2005
Posted in Indu$try, Useless Toys
Earthboard Dude Pleads Guilty
“The former president and chief executive of a Costa Mesa skateboard manufacturer pleaded guilty Monday to one count of securities fraud related to fabrications he made about merger talks with Vans Inc.”
Earthboards Sucked in February and they still suck.
December 8th, 2002
Posted in Indu$try, Useless Toys
Are We Having Fun Yet?
Not so long ago we posted Chris Gentry Toys (you know, Flowflap shit) and we found it odd that there were actually people supporting this lost cause. This friday we posted the letter from Flowflap and again we witnessed odd reactions. We then decided to track and see where those reactions came from. And, lo and behold, they all came from the same person! Someone in the San Diego area is a harsh Flowflap fan. How do we know all this? Hold down your mouse over a suckers name for a sec, and do your own tracing.
Why dont you ban the ip range? Ofcourse we could have done that, but then we be missing out on all the childish fun! We ONLY ban comments from fruitbooters since this site is not meant for fruits. Flowflappers are more then welcome!
October 14th, 2002
Posted in Stupid Shit, Useless Toys
Dying At Spreckels Theater
Looks like all the drunken fools made it into San Diego to check out Zero’s “Dying To Live” premiere. The show didn’t happen. We are glad to hear that not one person was hospitalized. Do you think that is because we are used to being beat the fuck up? If this was a Disney premiere, fifty kids would have been hospitalized and the papers would have called it a tragedy. The rest of the premiere dates can be found at Zero’s Website.
October 11th, 2002
Posted in Stupid Shit, Useless Toys
Put a Helmet On Your Kid and Send Him Off!
Exkate can get your 10 year old up to 22 mph in 4 seconds. Remote control throttle might be fun if you could tap into other frequencies and send your buddy out into traffic on the 405. The $1200 pricetag makes it a good stocking stuffer.